Tony Grebmeier is the Co-Founder of ShipOffers and creator of the Be Fulfilled Brand.
As the host of the Be Fulfilled Podcast: The Real Stories Behind Success, Tony’s been on a quest to redefine how we determine success. It’s the perfect show for anyone on their journey to personal or professional fulfillment looking for some additional motivational on the climb up success mountain.
Mindie: I am delighted to have my friend Tony Grebmeier with me on the show today. Tony, welcome to the program.
Tony: Thank you so much for having me here. I’m absolutely honored.
Mindie: I am as well, specifically because I think we’re going to win a Grammy for this episode. Because you and I both have something in common, a lot of people comment on our voice. So, I’m pretty sure that this is going to be an award-winning show.
Tony: I’m up for it. Let’s go for it, let’s get them something to vote for.
Mindie: Sounds good to me. So to get started, I would love to talk to you about your wealth evolution. I would love to know kind of how you grew up, what money was like for you then, and then take us into where you’re at today in terms of not just what you’re doing in your work, but also your mindset around money.
Tony: I love it. It’s a great question, couldn’t come at a better time in my life, too. Yeah, I grew up in Santa Cruz, California as just an average kid. I had truly above average parents and above average dreams. Both of my parents worked a lot. So, from a very early age, I don’t want to say that my parents weren’t there for me, I had to fend for myself, in the sense that my mom worked three jobs because my parents divorced when I was like three months old. So, all I ever knew growing up was working parents but not together. And so, I watched my mom work three jobs, full-time school teacher teaching special education, evening job, either working at the mall, or I learned about network marketing, from watching my mom sell skincare to other ladies in the neighborhood or you know, would come over after work. And she just was always working. And so, I knew if I wanted anything, that wasn’t the person to ask, if it was money, I needed to figure out how to make it myself. And my father always would give me money. And that was the transaction that I loved the most. Because I was like, oh, I just ask, and they’ll give me money. So, I grew up with two kind of sets of views of how to live and like earn income. And so, in my home with my mom, I worked. I think I had 18 jobs. Somewhere around like by the time I was 20 I had 18 different jobs.
Mindie: What? Wait, what kind of things were you doing to have that many jobs?
Tony: I worked at a VCR repair shop, not dating myself, when I was 11, I delivered pizza until I crashed my car. And then I was the guy holding the banner out front saying, hi hot pizza, come on in. I worked at the arcade, the ice cream store, did yard work around the neighborhood, hung Christmas lights, also broke Christmas lights by taking them down and throwing them on cars, that’s a whole other story. I had so many different jobs because I learned early on that I needed to try enough stuff to see what I didn’t want to do. So, I started learning and because my mom was gone all the time, I had a lot of time to spend walking around meeting people. So, I saw what hard work looked like and I was like, that truck is full, you’re dressed in overalls, and all day, every day you are pulling weeds, looks fun, not for me. Then I saw people go to work in business like a tire come home. And you know, they’d come home, and the wife would run to the front door and say oh my gosh, you’re home, I’ve got your slippers, here’s a cocktail, go sit down. I’m going to go make you dinner.
Mindie: Does that really happen?
Tony: Yeah, I thought it was like, leave it to Beaver, I’m almost 50. So, that’s how I grew up. Yes. It’s very much what I saw growing up. And then on the opposite side, when I went to my dad’s house, you talk about like income. My dad, I don’t think he bought love with money. But I think it was like, sure, here’s 10 bucks. I’ve got work to do. Right. My dad produced the Miss California pageant, he was the president of the Northern chapter of the interior design society, A.S.I.D, always working. And that’s where I saw what I wanted out of life. I saw the flashy cars, nice houses, nice things, that’s what I thought I wanted. Later, now I really have come to understand that they both equally give me gifts, my parents did without giving me money. They taught me things to like and things not to like. And so, I watched my dad go bankrupt twice, and that taught me what to do, because I almost went bankrupt. A little over like 11 and a half, 12 years ago when my wife and I had split, got back together. It was like a million dollars in debt. And I just saw everything like flashed before my eyes, like I just repeated what my dad did. That’s what I saw growing up. Of course, that’s what’s going to happen right? Whatever you kind of see you become, or you have the ability to become. So, I watched my dad buy flashy things, next thing I know he was living with me. I was moving then from Northern California to Southern California and I’m like, oh my gosh. And that’s when my life really changed. And that’s why I said, thank you so much for asking me that question. Because in the last, you know, some 50 odd days, I’ve been on a program, and it is to read and consume material. And everything I’ve been reading about is like financial wealth. And not necessarily just financial money transaction, but just like wealth and your mindset, wealth, in your routines, wealth in your relationships, like real wealth. And you know, I host a podcast, and I asked the question, what’s the real story behind success, and we remove money from the equation. So you couldn’t come into my life at a more timely moment asking a question that I’m actually studying and which I’m actually like, really wanting to learn more about, because I don’t want to repeat the cycle, nor do I want to teach my kids to repeat the cycle that they saw.
So, I’ve been really working with my wife to really create structure and value, we now do things completely different than we did even six months ago. All because I think wealth is something that I love to talk about. But I like to talk about it not as being transactional currency, more as what is it that you truly want? And then are you living a life that is going to allow you the ability to buy that life that you so desire?
Mindie: Tony, I love that, that you’ve been immersing yourself in this stuff, because that for me as well has been a long, long process, I, on the flip side did file for bankruptcy. And that was a huge shift for me where I was like, okay, I never want to do this again. That’s what the judge actually told me when I went to finish that process. He was like, the beauty of our society is that you get to do this once, do not do it again. And I was like, buddy, believe me, I will not even be close to that because I’m going to figure this out. So, thank you for just being open about your process in learning more and really sorting this out, because I think that not everybody, but a lot of people have that same experience of like, going through some financial, whether it be a crisis or just challenge or hardship and then saying I got to do something different here. So, I love that.
Tony: Dave Ramsey’s Money Makeover is what I’ve been reading just of late. That’s like the book I’m reading. And now he talked a lot about it. Normally, when somebody goes through a bankruptcy, and they get rescued, right, or they get forgiven debt, or they consolidate their debt, patterns don’t change. Normally speaking, they say that the same routine is going to show up again down the road unless you’ve had a complete switch. And that’s why I love Buckminster Fuller’s quote, you know, you never change an existing reality, right, by doing the same thing, you’ve got to change and build and transform and completely rebuild the mindset.
“You never change things by fighting against the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the old model obsolete.” ~ Buckminster Fuller
Because the mindset that got you in it, 99.9% isn’t going to get you out of it. So, you have to get some new logic, you have to get some new mentors and coaches and some people to help you say, hey, you know what? My financial currency, wisdom sucks. Just point blank, it’s flat out boring, and I need help. And that’s what I actually got to was like, how did you do this. And now I’ve gone and written a six-figure check along with my business partner, to a brand new consultant who’s now transforming the way we think as individuals and as Corporation. So, that we can actually have structure morning, noon and night. So, my kids have, like, there’s a will if something happens to me, there’s a trust, it happens. So, there’s ways of dispersing funds. So, people know what they’re going to get, and they don’t fight over it. Because when my dad died, my sister and I had to put our own pennies together, to buy him a plot, to find a way to have him buried. All of that stuff isn’t what kids should be worrying about. with their parents, it should be the complete opposite, you should have a plan. So, God forbid something happens when it does happen, that there is a plan, and everybody knows what’s going on. That’s a burden to put on your kids to make your kids all of a sudden go fork out the cash to go do that.
Mindie: Yeah, I would add or your spouse.
Mindie: And, I’m so grateful that you bring that up, because I 100% agree. And I’m so happy that Sean and I had done that, you know that we had everything laid out that it was set ready to go there were no questions about it. Here’s what it is. And that really helped tremendously. So, thank you for bringing that up. So, I have a question. And this is especially interesting to me in that you are in this conversation right now, yourself and with your family and with your business. How do you define wealth?
Tony: It’s not what’s in your bank account.
Mindie: I agree.
Tony: I was looking for the million dollars all the time. And now I use this when I coach people. I always say, So, hey, there’s a million dollars outside, go find it. Where is it? Which direction do I go? It’s outside, just go look for it, it’s all around us, it’s in abundance, it’s everywhere. And they usually come back saying, well, I don’t know where to begin. I’m like, oh, cool. So, wealth for me, first and foremost is in my mind. My mindset has to be way better than it used to be, right? When I said, I was like, a million dollars in debt. I had the question posed to me, why don’t you just file BK? It’s easy. Just do it. Like, it’ll be fine. And I said, you know what, I got into this mess, I’m going to figure out how to get out of this mess. And that’s where my wealth mindset really switched. And I began to ask people for intuitive thoughts, actions, wisdom, knowledge, how do I consume? How do I switch? How do I change? How do I audit every month? What I did over the previous month, so you can begin to see, and I’m not saying that you have to put your money in an envelope and go, this is your food money, or this is your gas money, like I’m not saying you have to do that. But I did begin the process, in my mind saying, am I spending just because I have the ability to spend. And that’s where I really began the mindset switch.
And so, wealth for me really is having an abundant mindset, and really having, you know, I used to live in my head, and I used to lead with my head. And that really transferred me doing transactions with humans, like what am I going to get in return? Like what is, if I help you do this, like, what are you going to do for me, and that’s where I had the money switch, of if I lead with my heart, and Sean and you both were able to help me do this, if I could shift from my head to my heart, and then go and serve, I’m going to be in a much better place. So, by leading with my heart, not my wallet, two things filled up, right, my heart felt good, because I knew I was doing something to put good out into the world. And in return, hey, I made a little extra money along the way. And so, wealth for me, has been such an interesting thing along this journey. You know, I’ve been sobering a little over 11 years, that’s been one of the greatest banks I’ve ever transferred my time into. Because wealth is just time and knowledge equal a result at the end of it, if you so desire to watch it, build interest, I’ve rebuilt my family without spending money. Like I’ve gone to meetings, and occasionally put money into a basket. And I’ve received some of the most knowledgeable advice from some people that they say I normally wouldn’t mix with, there are people that I wouldn’t go out and just go, hey, you want to go for a walk or, hey, you want to go to a restaurant and have dinner, it’s free. And wealth to me is, it’s an abundance. So, now, I have learned from people who care and pour their heart and soul into me, my sponsor personally has spent countless hours reading and sitting and asking and hasn’t ever said, Here the the bill is due, it’s the completely opposite. So, for me, I think its really knowledge. I think wealth is an abundance of whatever you’re after. So, I feel like I’m super wealthy in several departments, and I lack some and in really personal departments like I wish my relationships with my family were better. Like, I wish, my relationships that matter the most that I would find more time to leave work and go home and be 100% present with my family, I wish I had more investment in that wealth bucket. Because I think it’s going to pay dividends and the return is going to be exponential. However, I sometimes feel like if I don’t put all my time, money and effort into my work that I’m going to neglect the thing that pays all the bills and give me the time freedom, so I can go spend it with my family. So, that’s why when I say this couldn’t come at a better time, because I sit in this little like the rim of the glass, and I put my finger on and if you know, if you rub your finger on the top of it, it makes that noise and sometimes it’s squeaky and sometimes it just feels like perfect, and the vibration is great. And so, I live in between it, but wealth for me is really abundance of knowledge that you gain if it’s a specific area of interest, because I learned how to be a more diverse human in the areas that matter. And that’s why I love your heart path. And I love what you’re up to. And you know, my relationship with you and Sean was such a wealthy part of my life. It was never a transactional thing. And I had Sean as a coach for a period of time. And then we came to the agreement, like let’s just help each other. And that is authentic.
Mindie: That’s awesome. And let’s talk a little bit about your work. Mostly just so our listeners get to know you a little bit better. Tell me about your work, and I want to put this in two categories like you have your work, your business that you have created and been very successful at. But you also have this work of everything else that you’re doing. You have these podcasts; you have the work of recovery and how you’re helping other people. So, there’s kind of two parts. Could you speak to both?
Tony: Sure. I mean, it’s awesome because it’s personal and professional fulfillment. So, from a professional side, I have owned a company for the past 19 years, with my business partner, and we help entrepreneurs, digital marketers in the health and wellness space, primarily print books, white-label supplements, and provide a service to help marketers get products to their customers. And we do that every single day, 365 days a year, we’re always working, it seems like because we have built really great rapport with our customers, and by doing so has really allowed other people to say, wow, we can tap into that potential. So, from a professional standpoint, ShipOffers started in my garage with just an idea way back 2001. So, when you think about it, I’ve been doing this 19 year, and one of the things that I love, is I help people every single day to live out their dreams. On a professional side, that’s great. But there was something lacking inside of me on a personal level. And that’s where I really have dived in over the last 11 years to tap into what I truly wanted, was personal fulfillment. And that’s where your questions come in perfect alignment with my soul’s purpose and my mission in life, is to help people despite their past, despite everything they’ve gone through to create any kind of future by starting today with actually living their personal dream life. And so, what I do is when I get on the phone with somebody, usually in the first 30 seconds, 40 seconds, I can hear where you’re at, and I can ask questions that start getting you to be curious. And then you’re like, well, how did you know that? I’m like, well, I’ve only done about 2000 of these phone calls, and your story sounds like 1900 and 99. Other calls. So, let’s have a conversation. And by the end of the conversation, we’re more centered and in alignment, and they feel like wow, like, how do you do this? And I said, well, I’ve been doing this for 20 some odd years with my clients. Because I’m asking the same questions, I’m just maybe phrasing them just a little bit different to get to the same point, which is, we all have dreams. And most people aren’t even working in their dreams, or they’re working on the other 75% of their life where they think that’s what, if they just stay the course they’re going to achieve their dreams. And I’m like, that’s where you need your like, the formula for, I call it, “Time Life Care”. And that stands for Tony’s Life Care. And that’s where the personal dream life comes into play. And so, my journal, my podcast, they’re all just gifts that I’ve given to people to allow them to tap into their genius. And I mean, when is the last time you’ve heard somebody say, hey, how come you’re pushing around a dumpster? Have you ever thought of maybe to stop pushing around your dumpster? And you’re like, I’m not pushing it around my dumpster. I’m like, yes, every day of your life, you don’t realize it. But everything that you’ve done is in front of you, and you push it into everything you want. And then people start like, what do you mean, and we start going well, let’s dumpster dive for a moment. Let’s jump in. And like, how come you’ve never dealt with this? Well, it helped me when I was 10. I’m like, this is shit still happening today. It’s not going to go away. So, let’s start to deal with it. Or when you ask yourself, like, hey, I talk a lot of like, self-talk to myself. I’m like, yeah, the stories we tell ourselves, we begin to believe everything, the positive, the negative, we begin to believe that stuff. And if you have a lot of negative self-talk, where’s the positive? It kind of gets pushed off to the side and you live a negative self-talk life. I just really got clarity, maybe six, seven years ago from a dear friend of mine, Kevin Cohen, who said, Tony ShipOffers is your muse, it gives you the flexibility, it’s like your sandlot, it’s your playground. It’s your creative kind of like box where you can just be a genius, and test and incubate and try new things. I don’t get rich helping people. But I get rich, when I help people learn that they can do it themselves. And then they go, oh, my gosh, Tony, thank you so much. And then they go out and help somebody, and then there’s duplication. Now I’ve created copy and paste. And next thing I know, I’ve gone and served a bigger purpose and a mission, which in return has created a wealth of new friends, I know you can’t see it, but behind everything that I do is a smile and a relationship. And I try to build as many as I possibly can with as many humans as I can. Because it’s the one thing that when I wake up in the morning, I asked myself one question, are you ready to go be what you said you want it to be? Which is contribution and connection to the world, and I say yes. And I get out of bed and I go serve.
Mindie: That’s awesome. And for those of you listening right behind Tony is this huge wall of just photos of him and friends and just important people in his life. So, that is very apparent how important that is to you. So, Tony, I have a question that is in four parts. And it’s just to help us get to know some of the specifics about you. If we were to look at these four things, it would help us understand maybe some of the success that you’ve had or the way in which you do things. So, it’s an acronym called HERB. The H stands for habits. What are some of the habits that you have put into place that allow you to be creative, be productive, you know, achieve what you have achieved?
Tony: Well, I have an addictive personality, if you haven’t figured that one out. So, I am structured in the sense that if I literally say, I’m going to do something, I’m going to do it. So, I’m good in that regards. But I need a better rounded. So, even if it’s a penny, if I can get you to bet a penny, I’m in and I win, if I don’t have your buy in, most likely, I’ll lose interest. I’m out to win, that’s how I’ve lived my life since I was a little kid, I had to fend for myself. So, I had to learn how to do that. So, I journal every day. If it’s not in my own journal, it’s in notes on my phone, where I just get my thoughts out of my head, I think those are big time habits that we have to work on, getting things out of our head, so we can visually see them because otherwise, there’s just things that are going to keep popping up. So, I do that, I work out every single day, I read every single day, it doesn’t matter what you read, just as long as it’s helping you to expand your mind, and your focus on learning something. I lost my father to Alzheimer’s and dementia. And so, one habit that I do, which drives people crazy is I never drive the same route home twice. Now, what happens if tomorrow comes? Well, that’s a different route. I’ve never driven that route on that day before. So, it’s completely different. But if I leave the neighborhood one way, I won’t enter and go home the same way, I’ll go home side roads, and when I’m riding my bike, or I’m taking my dog out for a walk, I’ll mess up something. So, I don’t follow the same pattern. Habits are super important. And I’ve learned that you don’t lose a habit, you just replace it or empower yourself with a new habit. You know, I stay sober every single day by working a program that has been ingrained in me, which is a powerful habit that serves. But I think that when you asked H-E-R-B, I was like, you know what that is so perfect. Like, I can’t wait for the E-R-B because my habits have served me they haven’t hurt me. What hurt me along the way was I wasn’t aware of the warning signs of the bad habits that I had gotten into. Now I’ve replaced those bad habits with really powerful ones that have certainly served me, my company, my family and given abundance to a lot of people due to the simple fact of having a routine today.
Mindie: So, I have a follow-up question on that before we go on to the E. If you don’t have somebody externally, to bet the penny, is your journal or your own process enough to get that accountability or are you just like I’m out?
Tony: I think that’s something that I’m going to ponder for a second, I always have somebody to challenge, I’ve made that certainly a part of my life because I know that working with spondees, like create habits, like having them book for them just a book time with me, is like I created the habit, like for me to be super successful, don’t rely on me, get on my calendar, then my calendar pops up and notifies me, so I’ve created habits around it. So, when it comes to like challenges, you know, I flipped my bike the other day, and my mind was taking over saying, you shouldn’t ride your bike, you’re going to get hurt again, all these things and I’m like, screw you. And I have that negative self-talk with myself. And I’m like, you sit right there in between my two years. I’m going for a bike ride and I hope you enjoy the view.
Mindie: I love that.
Tony: I challenged that you know what out of myself every single day to become more than I was the day before. My favorite probably top five quote of all times is from Babe Ruth, like yesterday’s home runs won’t win today’s ballgames, like the sports column is blank today when you wake up. And when you look at like you’re at bats, you look at like how many times you got on base, how many runs you scored? How many times you strike out, it’s 00000? Right? So, your batting average from the time you wake up, is 1000. What’s it going to be at the end of the day? You play it safe; it’ll be 1000. I’m going to challenge you today to go get a good batting average in the three hundred. Go get a good batting average, go get dirty today, like come home with a new wound somehow, have fun, like, fail at something and realize that if you’re on your back, looking up, you can get up and you have the ability in you to push yourself. If there is no challenge, I am failing a thing called life. I need something like a weed to pop up in my garden, like darn it, like I just pull all the weeds three days ago, what the heck happened? Right? I need something to say hey, you know what? Stop for a moment and get into gratitude. And that’s the habit that I’ve really forged in my life. Is this the power to say hey, you know what? If I don’t like, if it’s got to be, it’s up to me, but there is something powerful about it. If you’re waiting on me, you’re late. I probably most likely have already done what you don’t want to do. And that’s why there’s speed bumps in neighborhoods, because a lot of people along life stop and I just keep going.
Mindie: I love that. That’s awesome. So, moving on to the E, the E stands for environment. And that can be your office, your home, your car, wherever you spend your time. What do you allow in or not allow into your environment?
Tony: I am so thankful Sean created the “When Life Works List”.
Tony: So, grateful that he helped me to say, all right, when your life works, what’s working? I’m like, you know, I’m eating healthy, I’m exercising, I’m journaling, I’m hydrated. Well, you know what happens, you don’t even need to build your list when your life doesn’t work. I for a long period of time lived in my life didn’t work list. I lived over there like, you know, people who didn’t add value, people who were takers, people who really didn’t appreciate what I was giving to them or helping them with. And I just said, you know what? Time suckers, see a goodbye, get out of my life. I love you to pieces. I hope somebody finds you and will help you. Jim Rohn also had a quote, there’s only seven or eight miserable people in this world, they just seem to move around a lot. So, when I learned that, that there are a lot of negative Nellies in the world, I said, All right. Well, if you want to be in my world, then I think the things that I need out of you is, I need you to add value not to myself, but to yourself personally, first to the people around you. And then how can we collaborate on something together? I don’t care what it is, like being on a podcast with you is collaboration, I honor and just appreciate the heck out of you. I think you’re one of the most genuine, incredible people in the world. Your heart is true. I know you have good intention. So, like I let Mindy into my world. Right? I know you were there, the very first time like Sean and I sat down in San Diego, and Sean was eating a steak and he’s like, hey, can we change the subject? And I was like, yeah, we can change the subject. And I remember later, we had like one of the most just incredible, heartfelt conversations. Because Sean let me into his world, like there was a lot of garden. And for a lot of my life, I’ve had a garden, because I thought you were going to take from me, I thought people were going to hurt me. I grew up and had things happen to me and I was hurt. And I felt like if you love somebody, you would never hurt them. And so, through the years, I have a lot of compassion for mankind, and I have a lot of compassion for the world that we all make mistakes. And so, I give people a shot, generally like a good shot. If they consistently let me down or mess up, I’m like goodbye. And I’ve had to have my wife whispered in my ear. Like, Tony, I know you really like that person, but that person really isn’t making the world a much better place. And that’s because I have blind spots. And all of us do.
And so, we need good people around us, good counsel to help us to see our blind spots. And so, I have an open-door policy, come and go anytime you want. And I ask you that you knock, I ask that you be kind loving and you’re tolerant to like the people around you. But be a really good human, just be a really, really good human. And I think you’ll have no problem building a great relationship with me. One of my downfalls is that I’m almost too busy sometimes for my own good. And that is why I’ve been working really, really hard to reduce my schedule by like 50%. I’d like to be able to like not to have a time restriction to spend with Mindie, say like, you want to have a conversation, let’s have a conversation, I don’t have anywhere to go. But one of the negatives that I have looked at or maybe it’s a positive, I just haven’t seen it yet, is I have a lot of stuff going on in my life. And if I really look at it, it’s a lot of stuff just to look busy.
Mindie: Well, very interesting observation. And I love that you brought up the, win life works list, because what Sean called the opposite of that is the win life sucks list. So, it’s like just knowing that comparison, it’s like, okay, which one do I want to be on? Obviously, when life works, so thank you for that. So, the R, in H.E.R.B, stands for resources. And resources can be books, courses, programs, mentors, whatever else. But the question around resources is, what are some of the resources that have really helped and assisted you and that you would recommend to our listeners?
Tony: Oh, this is cool. So, I have spent a good part of the last several months on MasterClass.com.
Mindie: Yes, I love MasterClass.
Tony: So, I had the opportunity to speak at the same event as Chris Voss, but I was like, who’s this Chris Voss guy. And so, I went with my wife out for the day, and I come back and everyone was like, you missed Chris Voss, he was awesome, he was an FBI negotiator, you could learn how to do this. And, I’m like who? And since that I become so fascinated with Chris and just love his stuff from A to Z. And so, sitting down, listening, those masterclasses is one thing, watching him go through, like hostage negotiation scenarios, working side by side with somebody through patterns, watching, like different ways of looking at them, has really helped through our sales organization, from a listening tool. So, helping us to, you know, when somebody on the phone, I used to always show the prices on goods, probably in the last three or four years, I just don’t negotiate off a price, I negotiate off the value. So, that’s been really cool, it just reinforced it. And then I started giving it to the team. And now when we bring new people on, it’s also like we’re giving them like a card to go get their own subscription, so they can learn and personally learn and professionally learn. Other great resources for me, like the book that I mentioned, has been really helpful, is Dave Ramsey, and I like Dave, and I think it’s applicable to a lot of people. But for me, the tool that I’ve used the most over the last four years, I use it every single day, is by Rick Warren. And it’s 365, it’s like, every single day, it’s on my phone, and I get a little notification to spend a few minutes in gratitude. And I get quiet and listen to the universe. And you know, that’s my time for a God of my understanding, to speak to me. And so, it’s a Bible app, that’s been super big, that’s like I read the Bible now, four times over the last four years, something I never would have thought would have been possible. But the tools for me like my journal, I use the journal on a daily basis, the be fulfilled journal. And that’s been really good, because that centers me. And if you don’t mind, I’d love to add this as a resource. So, many times people say like, you should get into gratitude, write three things down you’re grateful for and I’m like, how boring is that? Like, I will use Sean, because that’s one thing that mutually you and I connect on, other than being awesome people and winning an Academy Award for this amazing podcast.
Tony: But what I say, like I’m grateful for Sean, and a lot of people when they get into gratitude, will write something similar to that. Like, I’m grateful for Sean. I’m like, what am I really grateful for about Sean? And that’s where I like to live in the different layers of gratitude, because you got to get to the core like, I’m grateful for, at the moment, at time of being open-minded to look at a mastermind that I reached out to somebody at Genius Network, and somebody sent me back a video that I happen to sit at my desk at the end of my day before I’m about to jump on my plane and leave my family and I watch a video. And I don’t know who Sean Stephenson is from anybody. And all of a sudden, the very end he drops a mic and he says, don’t be a douchebag, this guy is freaking awesome. I wanted to go home, I cannot wait to go home and tell my wife about this funny video I saw today about somebody. And he just dropped the mic and I’m like, damn, that’s so cool, jumped on a plane. And the next morning, the universe, you know, gives me the gift of a lifetime which is you and Sean, and I literally was like, I’ve been around celebrities all my life from a very early age. Dom Della Wiese, Joanne Worley, Mary Tyler Moore, I grew up, my aunt Beverly has been in movies in Hollywood. So, I got to see old Hollywood. And I’ve been in country music and radio, and I’ve been around celebrities on stages, none of that stuff really ever, like, made me like stop and go, oh my god, you know what that is. But the next day, I’m at this event and Sean rolls into my life for the very first time. And I didn’t have a word to say, I’m like, that is something that I’m truly grateful for the gift to be really humbled by somebody’s presence, and then to just get down and take a photo. And that photo is the very first photo we ever took, that I use for everything about Sean and I because in that moment, Sean just made me feel like the most important person in the world. And that made me reflect on when I introduced Willie Nelson on stage and brought him off. He spent two hours talking to every individual knowing their first name and at the end, looking them in the eye and saying thank you, Tony. So nice to meet you. And that was something that I got from Sean, that made me feel special.
So, when I think of gratitude, I try to get to the heart of like, what am I truly grateful for? Not just putting like Sean. Sean’s great, but what about that moment or that moment of thinking of that person to bring like a smile to your face and so I try to get depth in my gratitude.
Mindie: Yeah, and that’s such a great way to explain that, because something that I always talk about with my clients. It’s like you have to, it’s not just a thought of gratitude. So, I’m grateful for Sean. That’s a thought. You are bringing it down to the feeling, which is also head to heart. And that’s the point, like, that’s true gratitude. So, I love that. And also, if you haven’t heard it yet, you definitely need to check out the episode with Chris Voss which is number 19. Because I told him how he ruined my life. It was a great conversation.
Tony: I can’t wait to listen.
Mindie: Rounding out this HERB acronym, the B stands for beliefs. What are some of your core beliefs that allow you to go in the world as you do, that have helped you to create what you’ve created. And really just the core of who you are and how you are.
Tony: That going to make me like, cry a little bit and be emotional just because my old beliefs serve me. They got me to the point where, you know, I had suicidal thoughts. I wanted to end my life; it wasn’t worth living. And then when I received a knock on my door, and my friend John Montazeri said, you know, Tony, your life has meaning and purpose, just how you’re living it right now doesn’t, it shifted who I was in the very moment. And you know, a lot of people say, like, you know, I found God and I’m reborn and you know, you get everybody gets to walk their own walk. I’m a true believer, if you ever want to talk to me about religion, you know, I was born a Jew, parents divorced, lived with my dad Catholic, lived with my business partners family, they’re Christian and married, nonpracticing at the time, Mormon, so I put it all in a Vitamix and hit puree. And I just believe that there’s got to be something bigger than you and me. So, one of my greatest beliefs is, all my life, I was told what to believe. That’s why, you know, at 12, I quit trying to go get my bar mitzvah. Because everybody told me that I need to go get my bar mitzvah. But I didn’t believe that I needed to go get my bar mitzvah. So, I think my personal beliefs really came back to me, when my friend knocked on my door and said, your life has meaning and purpose, how you’re living it right now doesn’t. And that gave me a new invitation to create some new beliefs, new foundations, and ultimately led to repairing a marriage that was separated for three years, I finally was able to get sober with the help of myself, my higher power, my sponsor, and attending meetings and buying into the belief that if I surrounded myself with really, really good thoughts, things would change. I quote, Jim Rohn a lot, because it’s easy to quote somebody who just speaks to me. And so, every time I have a belief, every time I hear Sean’s voice, every time I hear Jim Rohn, I snap back into the person I knew I can be. And I get away from the person who has like, oh, poor, you, you didn’t get what you wanted. And I just have to remind myself every single day, I have two choices, I can choose to be the person I was before I got sober. Or I can choose to be the person I’ve become since getting sober, which is a person every single day, lives with integrity, works really hard to serve.
And so, my beliefs are like, the top thing in my life, I just know, I’m going to be okay. That no matter what I face, it may hurt, it may be painful, it may be frustrating, it may be like, you’re just want to scream. But I know that there’s better in this world than there is bad. I know that every day things happen, right? Like, Jim Rohn talks about difficulty mixed with opportunities. That’s what the last 6000 years looks like. I’m pretty sure that’s what the next so many live years of Tony are going to look like, difficulty mixed with opportunity. So, I’ve come to believe the basic stuff. But the core stuff of who I am. And what I believe is, I believe I have a loving partner who cares immensely about me. I have parents who love me deeply, my sister who is like my best friend, I have two kids who absolutely love me. I have a business partner who truly supports me, and I’ve come to just put a wealth of good friends in my life. And those are strong beliefs, that when I was very suicidal, didn’t have. I thought nobody loves me, nobody cares about me, who cares if I leave? I’m like a freckle on an ant’s ass, like, I’m just something that someone’s going to squish. No one’s going to remember me when I’m gone. And those are the negative beliefs that we all have the ability to have. And so, I’ve empowered myself daily with saying powerful, some people believe in affirmations. I just believe in telling myself good things. Like you’re a good human, you do good for the world, you make a huge difference in people’s lives, the smiles on your wall just aren’t fake, they’re real. Those are real people that you’ve met and impacted, or they’ve impacted your life.
So, my beliefs have been really formed off of just like looking at the truths in my life and magnifying those to like, literally put them under a microscope and go, Bob Proctor’s right. Everything is energy. And there is so much energy around what I believe, I believe in God. I believe that I wasn’t created to just be average, that I was created to be phenomenal. I believe that you’re not weak for asking for help that instead, that’s where you become phenomenal in your life, that if you want to do it, go do it. And if you don’t know how to do it, believe that there is somebody out there willing to help you, or you can have unlimited taps of resources on YouTube. But you can find pretty much anything because someone’s done it before us. Even everything that we read, see, and look at was here before you and I got here.
Mindie: I love that. Tony, our listeners are like, man, this guy has an amazing voice. And they’re also interested in what you had to say. Where would you like to send them? Where should they go to find out more about you?
Tony: You can Google ShipOffers, and you’ll find that, or Tony Grebmeier and both of those places will give you resources that will hopefully give you maybe some additional momentum in your life. I just want to help people get to where they want to go and know that you know, no matter what you may be thinking or wondering about your life right now, like you were created perfect just the way you are. And everything that I have to offer Mindie or anybody in this world is only going to enhance your greatness. And I just literally want to say thank you. This for me is a really powerful moment, because this is an alignment thing for us. I just really appreciate you and I know how much you matter in my life. And so, thank you for doing this and putting out amazing content. And yes, I’ll go listen to Chris Voss, his episode on how he ruined your life.
Mindie: Thank you too. You’re just an awesome example of possibility and of strength and also creativity. Like every time I talk to you, you got some new thing going on, which is so great. Like, I’m going to make a journal. And here’s what I love about you, Tony, is that you don’t just talk about it, you did it, like it’s already done. And then oh, here’s this next thing and the podcast and whatever. So, I totally appreciate you, I appreciate your friendship. And I’m just super grateful for your wisdom on this show.